Will Moving in With Your Boyfriend Destroy the Relationship?


A Brief History of Couples Living Together

When you have reached a point in your romantic relationship with your boyfriend that he has asked you to move in with him, its often a big decision.  The decision to get an apartment together will either “make you or break you”.

Before the 1960’s, couples living together was often frowned upon. The general thought in society was that if you are ready to live with someone, then you should marry them.  If you were going to move in together as boyfriend and girlfriend, it was often refereed to as, “shacking up” together. 

During the 1960’s society began to change its view of couples living together before marriage.  It was the beginning stages of “thinking outside of the box”.  The 1960’s brought in the free love movement and peace movements.  Men and women began to think of ways to do things differently than the previous generation did. 

After the 1960’s, divorces began to become more on the rise and couples having sex outside of marriage started to become more common as well. People began to feel less shame in talking about it.  It was the early stages of men and women beginning to think about equality amongst the sexes. 

During the 1970’s, television shows like Threes Company began to introduce the idea of men and women living together without marriage.  The show showcased a younger generation being okay with living together and the older generation shaming it. 

The landlord Mr. Farley (played by Don Knotts) was part of the older generation.  He was against men and women living together if they were not married. In order to get around the dilemma, the two girls (Janet and Chrissy) told Mr. Farley that their male roommate (Jack) was gay.  Since Jack was now gay in the eyes of Mr. Furley, he could stay in the apartment. 

How Living Together is Viewed in the 21st Century

There are a lot of mixed reactions to couples choosing to live together in the 21st century.  However, as Christians, we are called to be celibate before marrying.  The scriptures are clear in the Old and New Testament that we are not to have sexual relations outside of marriage. Living together before marriage means that you are living together with someone that you could potentially have a fall with.  Also means that you are going to have a hard time living together without lusting for one another and having sexual relations before marriage.

Believe it or not, your relationship with Jesus Christ will also suffer. When you read the Holy Bible, you will start to feel like you can’t talk to the Lord because you are living in sin. 

There is a difference between sinning and living in sin. When you sin, you ask God for forgiveness and you repent of the sin. When you are living in sin, you keep on doing the same thing even though you know that Jesus is not in favor of what you are doing. 

Here Are Some Simple Rules of Life to Live By:

  • Honor God First
  • Read the Bible to Learn Its Verses to Keep Yourself Out of Sin
  • Don’t Go Against What You Know is Right
  • You Will Have to Answer to God for All of Your Actions

As you can see, your choices will result in you either following Christ or not.  I know that your relationship with Jesus will suffer if you don’t give Him the glory first. 

Will Living Together Ruin Your Relationship?

When you live together before marriage, you are taking away the excitement of what married life will be like when the two of you finally do get married. 

If you decide to live together every day, you are basically living a married life without a commitment to God. You are living in sin and will have to wake up to this kind of situation every single day.

Couples that live together often don’t marry.  The reason for this is because they have already seen what living together will be like.  Often, one of the people in the relationship decides that the other person is to hard to live with and often bails out before they both say, “I Do”.

Shouldn’t You Test Something Out Before Jumping into a Marriage?

There is nowhere in the Holy Bible that God says to live together before marriage. You may even get tempted into believing that your boyfriend/girlfriend is only going to be your roommate and not really your lover that is living with you.

Many times, Satan will deceive you into thinking that you can keep yourself pure, even though you are living together. However, this is often not the case since our flesh is weak. 

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