Is Your Christian Marriage Heading Towards Divorce?


Is your marriage in trouble and you feel like its over?  Perhaps your husband or wife has said that they want a divorce. The two of you are Christians and yet you can’t seem to make the marriage work?  If this sounds like you, then this article is going to help you to see why you are having marriage problems and how you can fix it. 

For starters, there are rules from the Bible that every man and woman must follow.   The New Testament is clear about how Christians are to view marriage and treat their spouse. If you are not following these instructions, then its most likely why your marriage is seeing chaos.  Let us first see what the rules are. 

In Ephesians 5:25, the book tells us that a man should love his wife and Jesus loves the church.  This is powerful and often overlooked by men.  Jesus loves his church so much that he died on the cross for his people.  Your love needs to be strong for your wife. You must not give up on her.  Read 1 Corinthians in the New Testament and see what love even is.  One of the first sentences in this book are, “Love is patient”.  It’s important to be patient with your wife is she is not seeing the light.

Mark 10:9 tells us that nobody should separate a marriage that God has put together. This is an important verse in the scriptures. If you have anyone in your surroundings that is trying to break the two of you up, its best to get rid of them. They are clearly not following the word of God and will only cause problems in the relationship.  You need to also ask yourself, “Am I running back to my family and gossiping about my spouse every time that we have a problem?” 

In today’s world, many men and women think that its okay to tell their marriage troubles to their families when they have a problem. The couple will often call upon their families to complain about the way that their spouse is treating them.  In return, the family develops a hatred towards your spouse because they think that they are hurting you.  This causes your spouse to feel uncomfortable around them when you get together for family functions.  It is important to take away anyone that is trying to interfere and break up your marriage.

In 1 Corinthians 16:4, it says that we must do everything out of love.  Check your actions and see if you have been loving to your spouse.  In many Christian marriages, the couple is often fighting and saying unkind words.  The two of you are not seeing eye to eye.  You must say that if something is bothering my partner, I must not do it.  The two of you must work as a unit.  You must work as one. You can no longer say, “This is my house. This is my bank account. I can have the job that I want. I can go to the school that I wish.  I will raise the children the way that I want to.”  As you can see, many Christian couples today have the mindset that they will do things their way and not work as a team.

Since we live in an “its all about me” generation, we can safely say that many couples today were taught as children to worry about themselves and nobody else.  Young girls are often taught to do whatever you feel like as long as you are not hurting anyone. Young men are often taught the same.  However, in marriage, the couple were never taught to work together.  Most marriages fail because the couple doesn’t work together. Instead, they want to live separate lives within the marriage.  However, “a house divided against itself will not stand.” 

In 1 Corinthians 7:3-5, the Bible teaches that married couples should be intimate with one another.  How has your intimacy been lately?  Has there been any throughout the marriage?  In many cases, the man fails to fulfill his role with making love to his wife or vice versa. Many experts say that most marriages today are sexless. This means that couples will often stop having sex for different reasons. 

If physical attraction is the problem, the two of you may need to start going back to the gym again and making yourself more attractive to your partner. You also need to set time aside just for love making and for telling your partner how you feel about them. 

Most couples usually go to their bedroom to sleep.  They often forget about having couples time.  It’s important for you to go away on short couples retreats if you need to. Sometimes it’s impossible to get away from the everyday troubles of life and social media. 

Women often feel unwanted or not good enough by their husbands if they are not wanted sexually. Women often need intimacy a lot more than a man does to feel wanted and loved.  It’s important for the man in the marriage to discuss this with his wife.  Ask her if he is giving her the intimacy that he needs. If he is not, this can be a reason why the marriage is falling apart.  Many men put work before their wives or simply say, “I am to tired and need to rest instead of having intimacy.”  It’s important for the man to pleas his wife and change their schedule if need be.

How Important is Prayer?

Prayer is the communication in which we speak to God.  Jesus Christ was known to pray to his heavenly father for hours.  He even asked Peter the apostle to stay up with him to pray because he knew that he was about to be taken into the hands of the Romans for his crucifixion (Matthew 26:40).

It is important to know that when we ask God for something in prayer, He will give it to us if its in his will to do so. We should never pray for something out of greed. Instead, let the Lord give you what he believes that you need.

Prayer gives us strength and confidence in knowing that God is hearing us and watching over us.  In 2 Chronicles 7:14, it tells us that we should repent of our wicked ways so that God will forgive us. Praise God that he is willing to forgive us and take us back even when we have done wrong. 

What Happens When We Pray?

When we pray, we begin to see God moving in our lives.  At times, we will pray for God to do the impossible for us. When we pray for others, we begin to see that doors open in their life as well. 

If you know someone that is leading a sinful and destructive life, it’s important that you pray for them and ask God to show them the door for repentance. It’s important to pray without stopping.

Sometimes, a person needs to fast and pray to get God’s attention. Many prophets and men that were called by God to lead people fasted and prayed.  Fasting opens doors for you in life. 

Singing songs to Jesus are also a part of prayer. Many times, I will sit back and ask Jesus to forgive my sins and then I will start singing to him. I will let the Lord know that my life is committed to him and that I am sorry for all that I have done.  I let Jesus know that I have repented from my sins and ask him to forgive me. 

In 1 Peter 3:1, The Holy Bible tells us that the woman should be submissive to her husband even if he is not a Christian so that you may be able to win him over to the Lord by your own actions.  If he sees that you are still treating him well despite his own wicked actions, he could in return give himself to Jesus because he has seen your goodness and wants to be like you.

Ephesians 5:24 tells us that a woman should submit herself to her husband.  In the United States and many other countries, the women’s liberation movement has taught women that its okay to not submit yourselves to your husband. Instead they teach to do whatever you feel like and not listen to him.

As you can see from the Holy Bible, a marriage cannot work if the wife is not submissive to her husband. In fact, the marriage is going to fall apart because your husband will feel disrespected by you.  If you are a wife that screams or talks down to their husband, its no wonder your marriage is headed towards a divorce. 

You need to understand that men want to have an authority over their wife.  It doesn’t mean that he should mistreat you.  However, out of love, it means that you are to be submissive. 

In 1 Timothy 2:12 the apostle says that he never lets a woman teach a man.  She is not to have authority over him.  In today’s 21st century world, many women of this world would say that this is harsh to talk to a woman this way.

However, this is scripture and Christians are required to listen to the words that are written.  Men often don’t like to be talked down to by a woman or to feel like she has power over him. The truth is that in the Bible, the man is the leader.  If you can’t accept this, you will always have trouble in your marriage. 

Marriages that are headed for divorce are often there because the man and woman in the relationship are not honoring their roles. It’s important for the two of you to start studying scripture together.  The Lord will begin showing the two of you what roles you are to take on.

Men are often shocked by find out that he is supposed to support his wife financially and support her.  Some men today are lazy and don’t want to work or support their family. 

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